What has happened?

I actually thought I'd be on here a lot more than I seem to be.  Life gets hectic...even being a "mostly" stay-at-home mom, I find myself with very little time to do much.  Actually, I think I just need to re-prioritize my life.  I find myself wasting a lot more time than I should, which leaves me no time to do what I need to be doing!  This is something that has been bothering me for quite some time.  I often remember back to when I was a teenager...I wasn't your typical rebellious teenager.  In fact, I was quite the opposite.  I remember my teen years as being the time when I felt closest to God.  I used to wake up every morning around 5 or 6 and have at least an hour to myself for devotions.  I was heavily involved in the ministry and literally woke up almost every morning with a prayer in my head.  Where have those days gone???  Why have I let life and the things of this world consume me?  Why have I let family, work, self, etc. become such idols in my life?  I long to return to the days when I first fell in love with the Lord...when He was my number one priority!  My lack of spiritual discipline and mixed-up priorities didn't happen overnight.  No, it happened over several years, and now I find myself in a state of discontent when it comes to my relationship with God, which affects every other aspect of my life.  My husband and I both realize that we need to spend more time with God... Lord, please help us to be faithful to You and Your calling.  Help me to seek you with a passion and desperation that I have not felt in a long time!

What I am going through seems to have affected the church in general.  It seems that today more and more churches are becoming seeker friendly and fewer and fewer people are truly committed to Jesus.  What has happened to America?  We have become so lazy and apathetic in our walk with the Lord and just like in my personal life, it has affected every aspect of our country.  What is it going to take to bring the church back to its first love?  What will wake it up out of its spiritual stupor and get the fire burning again?  Why do we seem to care more about ourselves and our own comforts than we do about reaching the lost?  I often catch myself getting caught up in the wants and desires of the flesh only to realize that it doesn't really matter.  Nothing truly matters but God.  When we are faced with eternity, the only thing we will care about will be where we stand with Christ - nothing else!  What kind of car we drive, how big our house is, how much money is in our bank account - none of it will matter on that day.  Why can't we grasp that concept, though?  Why does it seem so important now?  Satan has definitely figured out how to blind the church and we are allowing him to do a very good job of leading us astray...slowly and surely.  It hasn't happened overnight, but it has been a very slow and gradual process.  So slow, in fact, that it has gone unnoticed by many.  Dear Lord, I pray that you open the eyes of your people.  May we no longer be blinded by the tactics of the devil, but see clearly what you have called the church to be!

There's been a song on my mind lately that pretty much sums up how I feel.  It came out several years ago by the band Anointed and to this day remains one of my favorites.  It's called "Take Me Back," and this is the part that keeps running through my head:

I don't love you like I used to
when nothing came between my God and me
and somehow it seems I've lessened my dependence
and wonder why it's not the way it used to be

But I'm ready to learn how to faithfully love you
with my heart, my soul, and my mind
Take me back
Take me back to the time I fell in love.

I don't serve you like I used to
'cause I'm too busy serving me
and I don't spend the time with you I need to
and wonder why my soul cannot find peace

But I'm ready to learn how to faithfully serve you
with my hands, my life, and my time
Take me back
Take me back to the time I fell in love

The Beginning...

Since this is my first attempt at a blog, I figure that my first post should be a little bit about who I am...

I am:

... a wife, a mommy to one darling baby girl and a step-mommy to a great four-year old girl 
... originally from the Mississippi Gulf Cost, grew up in Chiapas, Mexico, and now live in Dallas, TX
... a Spirit-filled Christian seeking only to serve God and follow His will for my life
... a missionary kid
... outspoken - but only in my mind.  In reality, I hate confrontation and tend to keep my opinion to myself
... so very thankful to have a husband who loves me and supports me unconditionally
... politically, very conservative, and am concerned for the state of our country
... a stay-at-home mom with a bachelor's of Business Management (still paying off those loans!)

I love:

... my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ
... my husband and my family
... being a mommy!
... coffee and Diet Coke
... learning
... spending time with my husband and baby girl
... being bilingual and listening in on conversations when people don't realize I am fluent in Spanish
... traveling around the world doing missions work
... being a girl :-)

So, that kind of me in a nutshell.  If anyone actually cares enough to read this, you'll learn a lot more about me as I go.  My main purpose of this blog isn't to create a huge following, but to merely share the thoughts that I have throughout the day.  While I absolutely love staying at home with my four-month old, I do tend to miss adult conversation from time to time, and I have decided that this will be my way to "speaking out."  I have decided not to have a theme for the blog, as my thoughts are rarely on one subject for more than a few minutes!  I'm sure you'll read about my views on everything from nursing to the Bible to politics.

Happy reading!